Dave,

When I first started reading your advice, I felt that they
were wildly off base. All my prior success had been as what
you would consider a "wuss". However, curiosity drove me to
try out your techniques and I found they increased my dating
considerably. I went from only occasional dates, to having
3-4 dates every weekend. However, I have two questions
which I have not found the answer to in your book.

1. How long should I keep up the cocky/funny attitude?
It's really unnatural for me, and I'm not sure when I should
drop it, and show a girl my true self.

2. I have a good friend who I've been friends with for a
while. I guess she would consider me a "girlfriend-man" I'd
always be the one with the sympathetic ear, listening to her
problems and such. Is it possible, after getting this deep
in the "friend-zone" to become more than friends with her?
I don't want to risk ruining a friendship, but I've very
interested in dating her. How do I do it?
Thanks,

S.S., Maine


>>>MY COMMENTS:

Great questions. To answer your first question, WHY WOULD YOU
WANT TO STOP DOING WHAT'S WORKING? I realize that you may not
have been "naturally" Cocky and Funny before recently, but if
it's working so well, why would you want to change it?

I get a lot of questions about this topic, and I can really
understand the point. You'd rather be able to do what "comes
naturally" to you and be "yourself" around women.

But if you look at your second question, you'll find that you
actually spell out what happens when you just "be yourself".
You turn into "girlfriend-man". You become a "friend".

I don't think that's what you want.

But instead of thinking as Cocky and Funny as a process of
"not being yourself", instead think of it as "being
considerate of what a woman wants" and providing it. I
think that you can really learn to enjoy being Cocky and
Funny, and make it part of your personality.

To answer your second question, it's quite a task to turn
a girl "friend" into something more... but it definitely
can be done. I personally have better things to do with my
time, but if you're HELL BENT on doing it, then do this:

1) Stop talking to her so much.

2) Stop acting like a WUSS when you do talk to her.

3) Start busting on her more and being indifferent.

4) Tell her about how well you're doing with the ladies.

5) If she beings flirting back, then progress to The Kiss
Test and move things to a physical level.

You need to stop acting like a "girlfriend" and start
acting like a guy who makes women feel ATTRACTION at a
GUT level. But be careful, because if you screw this one
up, you'll probably lose her friendship as well.


***COMMENT FROM A WOMAN***

I am a girl. My boyfriend receives your newsletter. We came
across the advice you had given to the man about what he did
wrong with this girl by giving her six dollars for a drink
and she didn't answer or return her calls. I would think it
would be wiser to have a girl give advice seeing as how it is
advice on girls being given! The advice you gave him was not
only wrong, but it was bitchy. The joke he gave her was not
right. It was rude. I think you should find someone else to
give the advice on this site.

-J, OH