***QUESTION***

Hey Dave,

I got your e-mails for about a month before i actually
bought the books and I regret waiting so long. I have never
been so confident around women. I stand as a security guard
at the entrance of a retail store and 8's, 9's, and some 10's
pass by me everyday. I used to turn my head and stare away.
Now I know what they want from reading your book and I can
look at them, talk to them, and bust their balls even without
ever meeting them.

I do have a problem though. I took this beautiful girl
out on a first date, the C&F technique worked so well all
night from the movie to the dinner to the goodnight kiss
(tongue included) that we both definitely wanted a 2nd date.
So what's the problem. She can't stop thinking about me or
leaving me alone. I'm getting 10 text messages a day from
this girl that I really only want to date a few times. I'm
enjoying this bein single dating around and she wants me to
be with her everyday. How can I slow this down, without
losing the C&F personality?

Thanks Dave.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

I'm going to have to guess at a few things, but I'll give
it a shot.

From the sounds of it, you need to:

1) Stop with the "I had a good time" type comments when
you call for a follow up. You might experiment with
waiting longer to call... or waiting less time to call.
See what works best for you. But don't be so "nice".

2) Do more things to make your date feel ATTRACTION. Use
what you've learned to really turn the dial up. You might
test progressing further on the first date... maybe start
getting physical faster.

3) Make sure you keep her laughing, and keep busting on
her and treating her like a "friend" at first. Remember
the idea of acting like she's your Bratty Little Sister.

It sounds like you're doing something on those first
dates that's making the women resistant to seeing you
again... you need to figure out what it is and STOP IT.



***QUESTION***

David,

On vacation in Mexico, a girl asked me if she was "super
hot" and I said "Yeah, you're alright." Next thing you know
she made it her business to prove to me how hot she was,
including some freaky dancing, even flashing me, and a
little lip action. Moral: Never give them what the want. I
moved in to kiss a girl a little too early and she backed
away. So I went back to teasing her and on the next attempt
I went straight for the neck, ears, hands in hair and well
you wouldn't believe it; but it worked that time. Your book
has a lot of very good information, thank you for putting it
together. So here's my question: This girl at my gym is of
those that I've always wanted to talk to but never really
had the chance. She was bartending the other night and I
told her I'd seen her at the gym. She said "yeah, but I
don't make it in there as much lately." I replied "Yeah, I
can tell, you're really letting yourself go." Then she gives
me a shot and asks me if I'd help her with her workout." She
also said she remembered me from the gym and I said "So you
were checking me out?" So I get her number, not bad, eh? So
I'm in the bar for another hour with some friends and I was
going to order a drink from her later, but it might've
seemed like I wanted to talk to her again. She seemed busy
and didn't look at me. Seemingly wuss behavior or she's just
busy? Who knows. That was on Saturday and I called her on
Wednesday, still no reply and today is Friday. I'm thinking
either calling her once more over the weekend, asking about
playing hard to get and if she just randomly gives out
shots, or maybe going back to her bar in a week or two with
some friends. Again, thank you for all you've done and
thanks in advance for any suggestions.
A.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

I'm going to tell you something here, and leave it to you
to figure out why it's important:

YOU SHOULD HAVE LEFT RIGHT AFTER YOU GOT HER NUMBER.

This is SUPER ULTRA EXTRA important... and I want you to
consider it in your mind until you figure out why.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Wow, more priceless wisdom.

To answer your question, the way to see more than one
woman at a time is to NOT SEE ANY OF THEM TOO OFTEN.

When you see or talk to a woman more than once or twice
a week, it kicks in the natural "relationship" emotions
and patterns of communication and behavior.

If you keep things to once a week, and sometimes twice,
you'll tend to avoid this.

It's also good to tell the women that you're seeing that
you don't think it's a good idea to get into a relationship
too quickly with someone you just met (I believe this is
a very important idea, myself).

Thanks for the great ideas.


***QUESTION***

Hi David,

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your book...very enlightening.
I've always found myself attracting girls I'm not
romantically interested in, while crashing and burning with
the hotties. It was very confusing until I read your book.
I realize now that I was a wuss with the hotties by being a
typical "nice guy", and that the more I acted indifferent
with the girls I didn't like, the more they ate it up. You
gave me a new perspective on what makes attraction work,
and I'm glad to see that your book pointed out that you
don't have to be a jerk to be successful.

My game has improved but it still requires some refining.
Lately I find I'm stalling out between the first and second
date. So I'm wondering if I'm screwing up the date itself or
the follow-through. Here are the steps I take after a date:

1) I call within two days to say I had a good time and
basically make contact. I end the conversation first, and
let her know I'll give her a shout in a couple days...just
so I don't seem like I'm rushing into a second date.

2) I let two or three days pass and call to make
arrangements for a second date. At this point I usually
get a vague answer like "lets set something up for next
week"...and then it never happens.

Where is this falling apart and what kind of follow-through
do you use?

Thanks for the help,

SF
London, Ontario

***QUESTION***

Dave:
I downloaded your book a couple months ago, and read your
newsletters regularly. I have had success with women and
it's great. Here's my question. It's a common fact that
humans never stop learning, and you are no exception. What
new information have you learned recently that can
supplement the book? Can your subscribers expect a follow-up
booklet in the near future? I don't mean to be ungrateful
but now that I have read your book I feel like the most
well-informed man in the dating game. Knowledge is power and
the more I have the more power I have. Watch out ladies!!!
Can you help me out? I know you have the knowledge
thanks a lot

G- Texas

>MY COMMENTS:


***QUESTION***


Yes Dave, you are 100% correct. Even us older, fatter,
grayer, slower wusses can learn new tricks. I went from a
4 time loser to being called biggest old stud in town! Now
that was a hell of an ego boost! Especially since I'm 48
and close to 300 lbs. and yes, at the moment, I have steady
dates for 3 days of the week every week and 5 others
professing their love for me if only I will come take them
away.

Here are what I found to work:

1) Women over 35 expect you to be extremely inventive with
a cocky funny line or extremely truthful. They all claim it
is because they have had so many used on them, they are
totally immune to them. I tend to go the extremely truthful
route. the ie. you look like the type of woman who would
like a funny witty, intelligent, romantic friend. Have you
found any lately??? I want to shake their hand. Or something
similar.

2) If you are emailing back and forth and they want your
picture within the first couple of exchanges, run do not
walk, that lady to the discard pile immediately. Most of
those are so shallow they can not and will not see what
they are doing, no matter how funny and blunt you are. I
even tried the "what’s in it for me?" line, only to get the
reply of "me stupid, but only if I like your picture"

3) When the lady says I don't think I'm really your type,
you look them straight in the eye and say "ok, plenty more
where you came from" and turn and walk away. 9 out of 10
of them will be calling you in 48 hours.

4) They all know about arranging dates for the week and
finding the dates on the weekend. So tell them you only
have like Friday, Saturday OR Sunday open but not all.
Most will tell you to rearrange your week to fit them in.
The ones really really interested will call you on Saturday
to see if you can go out on the spur of the moment.

5) I tell them all I am too much to handle and too much to
love, so being friends is just perfect. But I have zero
experience in this dating more than one woman thing at a
time. Do you have any advice. Especially since I am sure
to make a lot of mistakes. Yeah, they all want to arrange
more time with me.

So you see, your techniques work. Even my 21 y/o daughter
who reads these occasionally says, "I can't agree all the
way, but damn he sure got the last 5 guys I dated nailed"

Keep up the good work Dave.

M.

This has the effect of making you a lot more picky about
what you'll tolerate... and it makes you see negatives
a lot more clearly in women.

Again, I think you're doing fine. Just stick with it
and you'll find a great woman to marry again, if that's
what you want.


***QUESTION***

Hi Dave.
I don't think the cocky/funny technique will work for me.
I'm 19 y/o, 5' 3" and 117 lb. I have an average build, dark
hair and blue eyes. I also have a fetish for girls with big
bellies. What do you think? Be honest.

SO

Birmingham, England

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Well, if I can get myself to stop laughing, maybe I can
answer you!

OK, let's make sure I have the facts straight here...

You're five foot three, weigh 117, and LIKE WOMEN WITH
BIG BELLIES?

Honestly, I think you're right... I don't think that the
Cocky and Funny technique will work for you... in fact

...I DON'T THINK ANYTHING IS GOING TO WORK FOR YOU.

Make sure you don't tell any of your other guy friends
about this. It might get ugly.

By the way, you may not have considered this, but women
with big bellies usually got them from eating a lot...
and my guess is that they might be expensive dates.

Watch out.


***SUCCESS STORY***

Dave:

Dated someone for 4 years. Turned into a wussy boy a couple
times, and both times she left me for the same guy. This guy
was a selfish, conceited jerk, but he was the ONLY guy she's
ever dated who she couldn't wrap around her finger. He was
an impossible challenge...and so her sexual attraction to
him was enormous. (Hmmm...is there a lesson to be learned
here...?) Since we broke up about a year ago, I've been
reading your newsletters and your ebooks. Now I'M the
challenging one. I don't flatter women with compliments, I
don't buy drinks or flowers, I split the dinner tab, I
don't always call (or call back) every day, I keep my social
life busy and interesting. And I never ever EVER lose my
composure with a woman - no matter how much I'm attracted to
them. (In truth: I caved to one woman, told her how
attracted I was to her, and instantly found myself in the
"just friends" pit of no return. Oops. Had to learn the
hard way.) Now every time a woman tries to test my level of
"wussiness" I completely annihilate them with a cocky+funny
comment...and they LOVE me for it. And...of course...guess
who suddenly wants to date me again...

Thanks D,
M.S.
Chicago

P.S. Took this off the end of the 1st paragraph above...it
was getting too long, but I love this perspective from a
woman: While investigating this illogical phenomenon, I
asked a somewhat-attractive female friend of mine "so...can
you shed any light onto the whole 'why women are attracted
to jerks' idea?" And her answer (quote): "Because we're
too leary of a nice guy. Nice guys creep me out. They seem
like I can walk all over them and I hate that. Women want
a bit of a challenge."


>>>MY COMMENTS:

This is truth from the mountain. Read it 100 times a day.

Print it and tape it to your computer monitor.

Put a copy in your wallet... next to the money so you see
it often.

Put one on your car sun visor and mirror.

And go read it again now.

After being
recently divorced (Dec/01) after 24 yrs and thoroughly
confused about dating and what women want. I bought
[another dating book] and was even more scared to do any of
what was asked to do. I bought your course and coupled with
watching the players in clubs I knew C&F was the answer.
I used it successfully on over (9) women since Jan/02 all
resulting in them wanting much, much more* than I was
willing to give. They all call from time-to-time for fun!.

*Here is where I have the problem and it might help others
trying for this type of relationship. I am single and love
my Space and I want to have fun for a while and eventually
marry again I’m looking for Her and it takes a while to see
if she is Her I get them hooked way too fast and not trying
to do so This is how: Women are attracted to C&F, They want
fun and excitement; I think I know why they want funny for
the fun things to do in life (too many boring guys out
there) and the cocky part piques their inner flames to what
could happen as far as passion. If when you are passionate
with them you have to be a Leader and show them as bad a boy
as they can handle. This has in all instances so far lead
them to call me and pursue me: the next day and weeks ahead.
They want a far deeper relationship. They want C&F in their
lives. These are not clingy people (7-9’s)(24-44yrs) and
profess to want to be friends first. Email is great as it has
a way of helping them say things they wished they could say
in person. Do you have any wisdom on how to do C&F and not
hit all of her senses?

Thanks Again for C&F
J.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

lol... you poor, poor dear. Sounds tough, really.

I think you're doing fine. You're on the right track, and
I think that you're going to find an outstanding woman to
have a longer-term relationship with.

I personally think that the problem isn't the techniques
you're using, it's that you're now seeing that YOU CAN
CHOOSE A WOMAN, rather than having HER CHOOSE YOU... and
it's making you far more SELECTIVE than you were in the
past.

When you're seeing several attractive women at the same
time, you begin to realize that you can have whatever
you want. You no longer have to settle.

***QUESTION***

Dear Dave,

I'm real sorry but I still cannot figure out how to build
bridges after getting the email address. Normally the next
day I send the lady an email, she replies and then I can't
think what on earth else to do. My overall goal is to get
with her - so can you help me man?

I.M.


>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yes, I think I can help.

1. Set up a meeting for tea.
2. Have her stop by your place on the way to tea.
3. Have fun, interesting conversation.
4. Invite her back to your place.
5. Use the Kiss Test.
6. Use your creativity and imagination.

Don't focus too much on "getting with her", just focus on
getting to THE NEXT STEP.

In other words, when you email don't say something like:

"Hi, it was great meeting you. I'm single and nice, and
you seem like you'd make a great girlfriend for a sweet,
desperate loser like myself."

Stay off of heavy conversation. Don't talk about
relationships and marriage, etc. Just talk and enjoy
yourself. But keep progressing as you do.

As long as you relax and make each progressive step
easy and natural, you'll be fine.

Again, just take it one step at a time.


***QUESTION***

Hi David:

I’m 42 and a bald, average, confident guy.